We’ve already talked about the insanity of the disease, but let’s drill down further and talk about our brains and our relationship with them.  The brain is made up of 100 billion neurons – cells that work together to make up our minds.  It is, by far, the most sophisticated computer ever designed – by an exponential factor.

What makes those of us that are compulsive eaters different from other humans with the same type brains?  In 12-Step land, the second Step speaks about the word “insanity,” and I explored this insanity extensively in a previous chapter.

What I spoke of in this case concerns a very narrow band of faulty thinking, not a generalized situation of mental illness.  Remember the definition of insanity from earlier?  At these times, when we are triggered, we have: “a state of mind that prevents normal perception.”  It’s important to remember that in times like this, your perfectly well functioning brain is making decisions based on corrupted data.

I always joke that humans are born with all hardware, but no software.  We then went through years of loading that software:  it was called school and involved facts.  Up until this point, it is very much like a computer. 

Then, however, we throw a monkey wrench into the works.  In addition to the facts, we have loaded in emotions.  We have also loaded in years of memories, some of them hurtful, some of them traumatic.  These memories come with reminders of how we have responded in the past.  This allows us to save time by remembering how we handled things before so that we can use a “shortcut” that allows us to follow that previously used path again – often over and over.  I used the word “path” for a reason:  it corresponds the parts of the brain called “neural pathways.” 

Let’s say you have an upsetting event, which causes you to feel emotional pain.  Or, something comes in via the senses that brings up the memory of using food for comfort.  This brings up the euphoric memory.  Both of these things are triggers.  We then look for the shortcut, and there is our usual rut:  let’s go binge!